Slaying Your Media-Dragons

The Kaiser Family Foundation recently came out with this study; Generation M2: Media in the Lives of 8- to 18-Year-Olds. The Results were staggering.

• Kids spend more than 7.5 hours with media—TV, iPods, and the Web, plus another two hours on their cell phones, per day.
• Families communicate an average of 40 percent less when the television is on.
• Heavy media users reported lower grades and happiness levels.

Slaying the media-dragons in our home is an ongoing battle. As the children have gotten older, we've gone from battling the TV to warring against cell phones, Facebook, and video games. (Not in that order!)
As the matriarch of our home it wasn’t long before I realized I was plugged in a lot, and when I looked around, it was clear we were battling a fire-spitting media-dragon—our television.

When I stopped to think about it, there were days I gave more of my undivided attention to it than any of my four children combined. It was my daily drug of choice, taking me to far-away places, allowing me to peek inside homes I prayed were more dysfunctional than ours, and taught me more about great white sharks than I cared to admit. Yes, I loved my TV. I couldn’t imagine living without it.

Unfortunately, what was originally created to add a small slice of entertainment, fast became the media bully on the block. With my full consent, I allowed it to take center stage and become the biggest time-stealer in our home.

We unplugged our television two-and-a-half years ago. It's been the best decision we've ever made. Sure, we still watch a family DVD together with a big bowl of popcorn, but the constant white noise is no longer distracting me from what's really important, my family.

Electronics were created to make life easier. Instead, they've become time-consuming beasts gobbling up any extra moment in our day. Since unplugging the kids are doing even better in school. Books are seen in the hands of my kids now, and their test scores are soaring. Have I mentioned the greatest advantage? Our home is once again a sanctuary from the storms of the world. Peace reigns once again.

How about you? What fire spitting media-dragon are you battling?


Unplug and kill it today.



Read Wall Street Journal article "Your BlackBerry or Your Wife?" and Yahoo News article "Unplugged Teens Find There is Life After Electronics" for more interesting stories about family's like yours who've unplugged.

Change of Plans - Movie Night This Saturday on Fox!

What are you doing this Saturday night? Any chance you have a little time to watch a family movie together?

Change of Plans is a pro-family, pro-adoption movie on Fox this Saturday night.

Check out the trailer here: Change of Plans 

Change of Plans tells the story of a young couple, Sally and Jason, whose lives are turned upside down when Sally's best friend from college is killed in a tragic accident. Sally and Jason are forced to make some life-altering decisions when they discover that she has been named legal guardian to her friend's four children, three of whom were adopted from third world countries. Change of Plans stars Brooke White (American Idol) and Phylicia Rashad (The Cosby Show) and according to the official website, portrays how "fulfilling life can be when you look beyond your own plans and invest in the lives of others." What a great discussion starter for you to engage your kids around issues that are truly important. - Dennis Rainey, Family Life



After the movie is over, take a moment and talk with your children about the story line and what it means to invest in the lives of others.


Don't forget, this Saturday night, gather the whole family together, pop some popcorn and spend a night at the movies - in your family room!

Whose team are you on in 2011?

Do you have a favorite sports team? What candidate did you support for president in 2008? Each one of us has an answer for that question. We may not always like everything about our sports team or our candidate, but we call ourselves fans or supporters anyway.

But, what if our words don't match our actions?

What would people say if you claimed you supported John McCain, went to all his rallies, put his signs in your front yard, but then voted for Barak Obama?

If you were truly for McCain, your actions would show that.

The point of this article is not to discuss politics, but to point out the problem with claiming to be part of a group and then doing things that are contrary to that group’s beliefs. Specifically, I’m speaking of Christianity.

When you become a Christian or if you call yourself a believer in Christ, once that choice is made, it requires a certain response.

If you claimed the New York Yankees were your favorite team - you'd  root for them and against the Boston Red Sox (or vice versa if you are reading this from Beantown).

When you're in a group or on a team, you receive a membership handbook that outlines what you have to do to belong and what is expected of its members. God has given us a handbook called the Bible. 

So, do you claim to be on God's team? Would people be surprised to find that out?

James 3:8-10 says: “But no one can tame the tongue; it is a restless evil and full of deadly poison. With it we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in the likeness of God; from the same mouth come both blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not to be this way.”

Do we tame our tongue? Are we worshipping God on Sundays and cursing man Monday through Saturday? Clearly, God’s word counsels us not to curse our fellow man. If we are gossiping or backbiting our family members or co-workers, we are not exhibiting the traits of a member of Christianity.

Second Timothy tells us: “All Scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness; so that the man of God may be adequate, equipped for every good work.”

As members of God’s team, we need to be in the Bible (our spiritual handbook) every day. We should not know more about our favorite sports teams or celebrities then we do about God.

It has never been easier to do a daily devotional. You can have them emailed to you or even sent to your cell phone. But, beware of letting these Twinkies provide you spiritual nutrition. As believers, we need to take time out for a Biblical feast, not only on Sundays.

Colossians 4:5 reminds believers to “Conduct yourselves with wisdom toward outsiders, making the most of the opportunity.”

Our conduct should lead others to Christ and should clearly indicate our membership in His group. This is our opportunity to show non-believers a different way to live in our fallen world.

And, when we say we are rooting for God and are on His team, they won’t be surprised to find that out.

66 Love Letters - Prologue

Welcome SunHills gals!

Are you looking for the gathering spot for 66 Love Letters?

Then you've come to the right place!

Click HERE and be transported to where all the fun is happening.

I'm Stuffed!

Stuff. We all have it. Make no mistake about it, our houses, cars, rooms, cupboards and even purses are filled with it. Things you once loved or didn't, now stuffed in a closet, behind a chair, under a bed or overhead in the attic.

If you were to make a list of all the stuff you have in boxes, stacked in the garage, or tossed beneath a cabinet, you couldn't. Forgotten stuff, used only for a time, not to be remembered again.


Stuff holds us in bondage. It keeps us from moving forward, from focusing on the present. And, at times, it overwhelms us. Yet, each Christmas I want more of it. I check the Sunday ads searching for it. Not only do I want more stuff, I want to give stuff to my husband and children too.


My teenage daughter Meghan, recently told me a story her college professor shared with her class. It helped me see “stuff” in a much different way.

As the students filed into the college class for their final exam, they were greeted by their teacher. He was standing beside a table of archaic looking items. As each curious student came forward, their professor explained the odd -looking objects, and then proceeded to try and sell them to his students.


“This here is an 8-track player. I'll sell it to you for $100.00.”


“Are you kidding? Those are obsolete. No one uses 8-track players anymore.” The student smirked.


“Well, how about this transistor radio? I'll give you a deal...$40.00.”


Another student peered over the table and laughed at his teacher. “That transistor radio is a dinosaur. And it only gets AM!”


“Ok, then how about this TV?” The professor waved his arm towards the gargantuan television, towering over the table.“I'll give you a bargain...$500.00.”


A chorus of students roared with laughter. “Is this a joke? I bet that TV weighs 500lbs!” The students crouched down to get a better look. “Are those dials for changing the channels? Cmon' professor!” Their laughter had them doubled over by now.


As they chuckled and giggled, their teacher calmly shared, “Men and women... some of them your own mothers and fathers, worked long hours to bring this “stuff” home to their family. Time taken away from their loved ones was used instead to bring a couple smiles, and a few light moments to those they cared about. Not much has changed today. People are working harder and longer to give those they love “stuff”. When what matters, what really counts, is time. And in time, even your newest and neatest toy this Christmas will become archaic, odd and obsolete.”


The teacher looked around his classroom. The laughter had stopped.



This Christmas, take a moment, ask the Lord to help you discover something your husband and children can't tuck away to be forgotten in a box or on a shelf. Take a walk together. Make cookies together. Share a cup of cocoa together. Cuddle on the couch together. Play a game together. Love on one another and laugh together.

Family memories should be the “stuff” we tuck away in our hearts this holiday season.




Originally posted at Blessed...http://www.onesoblessed.com/ December 2009

66 Love Letters

When was the last time you read a love letter? Have you ever received one? Do you remember how it felt reading words penned from the heart of someone who loves you?

The Bible is God's love letter to you.

Sixty-six books in the Bible share His story of forgiveness and hope, and a love for you that began even before He flung the universe into existence.

He loves you.

Our women's ministry is reading 66 Love Letters, by Dr. Larry Crabb. If you've never fully understood what the Bible is all about, or how and why it matters to you - get a hold of this book and meet back here each Sunday.

Written in the same way as Amy Carmichael's; His Thoughts Said...His Father Said, and Sara Young's; Jesus Calling, Author, Larry Crabb, talks to the Lord in each chapter, asking Him questions and discovers how each book of the Bible is a love letter from God to us.

You can purchase it on Amazon here, head down to your local library and check it out, or just follow along in your Bible. Each chapter of 66 Love Letters represents one book of the Bible - from Genesis to Revelation.

We will begin with chapter one in 66 Love Letters (Genesis) next Sunday (12/19) and you can comment below. Each Sunday we'll meet back here and I'll post a little something about the following chapter read and what spoke to my heart. I pray you will join us and share what God is saying to you too.


If you've never received a love letter, or if it's been years since your husband has given you one, it's time you read the greatest love letter of all...written from the hand of God to you.

Holiday Traditions - Family Fingerprints

My mother had no idea she'd begun a family tradition. Distracting all of us with hot cocoa and Rice Krispies Treats, instead of arguing with each other about who would hang the prettiest ornaments, instead, our mouths were full of sugary heaven. 

Fast forward twenty-five years, hot cocoa and Rice Krispies Treats are present in each of her four children's homes. No Christmas tree is decorated without them.

Family traditions often start with little planning and even less fanfare. Yet, they hold memory-making power. They are unique family-fingerprints we leave behind for future generations.

Christmas is a wonderful time to leave a few family fingerprints on your own little ones. I thought I’d include a few fun things to do with your children this holiday season.

Read a Book – Turn off the TV and spend a few minutes each night reading a story to your children. Whether your kids are six or sixteen, it’s a sweet time that will be remembered. Click here for a list of Christmas books to read aloud this season.

Tour of Lights – When our children were young we’d tell them to get bundled up in their pajamas and jackets. I’d make hot cocoa (I’m quite the hot-chocolate-pusher.) and bring it in the car with lids for them to enjoy. Christmas music would play on the radio as we toured the neighborhood, “Ooohing and ahhhing,” over each beautifully lit-up home.

Anonymous Santa – Our children have memories of going to the dollar store and purchasing a  bag of toys. On Christmas Eve we’d park our car and black out our lights, while the children ran our wrapped gifts up to the home of an unsuspecting needy family. Don’t let money hold you back from blessing a hurting family this season. A tray of cookies and an anonymous note will touch the heart of anyone.

Operation Christmas Child – Children in other countries don’t have the Christmas morning our children have. Take your little one down to the store and fill a shoe box for a little girl or boy. If filling a shoe box isn’t your thing, most churches have “angel trees” with names of less fortunate children in your area. Pick one and bless a heart this Christmas.

Christmas Cookies—Take a plate of homemade cookies to your local police or fire department. Don’t forget your police/911 dispatchers!

Movie Night—We end our Christmas season each year with a family movie. Tired from the day, full from the food, we gather in our pajamas—pushing aside stray pieces of wrapping paper and ribbon, and cuddle up to my favorite; It’s a Wonderful Life. For me, each December 25th ends with a few tears and gratefulness for the blessings God has given me…and a reminder to Remember, no man is a failure who has friends.

Advent Season - Jotham's Journey

Did you know Advent season begins this coming Sunday?  It falls every year on the first Sunday following Thanksgiving. If you have no idea what Advent is, or need a refresher course—click here: The Christmas Advent Season.

Did you know each color of the candles in an Advent wreath represent something different? Does your family pay attention to this part of the Christmas season?

We didn’t.

Sure, we've heard a few teachings from pastors over the years, but we've never been inspired to do anything more. This year, our pastor shared how his family of six recognizes the coming birth of Christ and celebrates the beginning of a new Church year in his own home.

We were inspired.

They say, imitation is the biggest form of flattery. So, we’ll be Advent copy-cats this year and follow his family’s lead. I thought I’d share what we're doing with all of you, just in case you feel the desire, like our family, to create a new family tradition and make this Christmas season even more God- honoring.

Beginning this Sunday, we will light a candle and read nightly devotions from the children’s book, Jotham’s Journey. I've included an excerpt below:



Over and over Jotham screamed for his family, but there was no one to hear him. They had vanished. He was alone. Where had they gone? How long ago had they left? Through quick, stabbing sobs Jotham told himself, "I must look for my family, I must search until I find them." And so his journey begins. In this widely popular, exciting story for the Advent season, readers follow ten-year-old Jotham across Israel as he searches for his family. Though he faces thieves, robbers, and kidnappers, Jotham also encounters the wise men, shepherds, and innkeepers until at last he finds his way to the Savior born in Bethlehem.

Written as a devotional for parents to read to their children during Advent, Jotham's Journey unfolds day by day until the exciting climax on Christmas Day. Each day's installment of the story is followed by a short devotional which will challenge your family to share in Jotham's discoveries.

Recommended for ages 4 and up.


Softcover, 168 pages, with introductory notes and ideas for celebrating Advent


Head over here and get your own copy of Jotham's Journey today. There's still time!


Does your family celebrate the Advent season?

Are You a Blessing or a Burden?

The ref blew the final whistle and parents on our sideline cheered our victory—Paul and I cheered for a much different reason. The last day of soccer season is a joyous day for my husband and I, and last Saturday was no exception.

But, before we could get too excited, there was still the team party to attend. I’d printed off a coupon that would give us two large pizza’s for $20.00.

Unfortunately, when my husband made his way through the long line of families at Mountain Mike’s Pizza parlor, he was told by the gal at the register, “You’re total is $38.00.”

“What?” Paul was taken aback, and I was beckoned with a head nod and a fast wave of his hand.

“I thought you said this was going to be only $20.00 Joanne?”

“Oh no. I left the coupon in the car.” I told him, already trying to head toward the parking lot.

“Don’t bother getting it. Do you see how long this line is? I am not about to make all of these people wait for us.” He replied angrily.

It didn’t help matters when five hours later we were at the grocery store where I’d thought we were eligible for a free turkey. When the clerk charged us for the turkey and explained how I’d confused the deal they were having, my husband was fit to be tied.

As you can imagine, I was not having a very good day and neither was he. When we discussed the incidents later, I apologized and he shared, “I’m having a hard time seeing where you helped me today. You are making mistakes that create a financial burden for me. I know you didn’t do anything intentionally, but these kinds of things are happening a lot, Joanne.”

He was right. Lately I wasn’t focused on ways I could help him. Sure, I kept the house picked up and made his lunch from time to time, but how was I intentionally trying to make his life easier?

The truth was, I wasn’t.

And the LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone.

I will make a companion who will help him."

Genesis 2:18 NLT

God’s Word tells me I was created to be not only Paul's friend, but that I was designed to be a help to him as well. When Paul shared how I had created a burden for him, I felt terrible. And, I admit…there were a few tears. He is my best friend. I want his life to be easier when I’m a part of it, not more difficult.

It got me to thinking, how can I be a help to him? As his wife, I shouldn't be his burden-maker, I should be a bearer of his blessings.

I thought I’d share a few ways I’ve learned to be a blessing instead of a burden to the man God intentionally created me for.

• Follow-Thru.  I have quite a few to-do's on my housework list. Many of which I've shared with my husband; organize our closet, clean out our pantry, clean the bonus room, go through the kids old clothes. It's time I became a woman of my word and began to tackle a few of those tasks. After all, he was thrilled when I organized our silverware drawer. I'm sure he'd be elated to discover his socks all in once place again.
• Focus. Quite often I give my husband only one ear when he's talking to me. It's frustrating for him to share a story when I ask him to repeat himself over and over again. Focusing on what I'm doing also helps me to remember coupons in the car and read the fine print about turkey sales at the grocery store.
• Find.  Find ways to help. Now, each morning I try to ask, "What can I do to help you today?" You'll be amazed to discover how much your husband appreciates being asked this question.
• Fill. My words can be life-giving when I fill my mouth with inspiration and encouragement. There is nothing more taxing on a man than a woman who nitpicks and complains. I need to fill my husband’s ears with those life-giving words.
• Fun. When Paul wants to relax and have fun, I want to be who he thinks of first. For fun I take him out for a coffee date, walk up and surprise him with a kiss and a cuddle, or leave a sticky-note somewhere on his office desk at home. I’ve even surprised him with ice cream and a movie in bed.

So many families today are struggling to keep their financial heads above the rising economical tide. It is no surprise that it's one of the biggest stressors in a marriage. Whether your husband is sensitive to finances in your home, a new job situation, or is just over-worked and stretched to his limit, you are his helper, the one God created to stand shoulder to shoulder and carry the load together.


How about you? Is there a way you can bless your husband today?